Moving forward anyone caught with an unlicensed chicken will be in breach of the law and subject to fines and poultry reclamation.

I am entirely serious.

Back in March the UK govt's "Department for Environment Food and Rural Affairs" (DEFRA) announced changes to the poultry registration laws, essentially redefining a "flock" from "50 birds or more" to 1.

So, from now on, everybody in the country who keeps even a single bird – not just chickens, all outdoor birds – has to register as a poultry keeper.

You understand, this is all about protecting birds and the public from avian influenza, not at all about increasing government monitoring with the final aim of stamping down on self-sufficiency.

Banish that cynical thought from your head.

Fortunately, the people of the UK have a tried-and-tested method of dealing with absurdity—more absurdity.

In the run-up to the deadline thousands of people took to the DEFRA website to register their "chickens" – frozen, nuggets, unhatched and even rubber: